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Ode to the Middle School Teacher

I'm told that there's a special place in Heaven
for middle school teachers.
I'm in no hurry to find out,
but I hope it's true.

First you love me.
Then you hate me.
Now you just don't care,
except when your best friend decides to.

So what I thought :P was a typo!
Does that make me lame?
You told me that WTF meant Wednesday, Thursday and Friday—
but now I'm on to your games.

You little hormonal rascal.
Always laughing,
or crying,
or refusing to talk, rolling your eyes.
You worry me, make me fearful.
For I have two daughters on the rise.

I caught you texting in the bathroom:
UR BF KMOL! JK GG!
Translation: Your boyfriend kissed me on the lips. Just kidding. Got to go!

I watched your YouTube channel:
You actually snuck in a flip camera in my class and videoed!

I read your Facebook comment:
ppl actin lk da hrd n din win u fight da get da ass beat
Cyber bullying is a big problem
And using Standard English another feat.

You said it was your favorite movie,
one you thought that I ought to see.
I could only watch Bad Teacher for 15 minutes.
Now you're suggesting the TV show Glee.

I know it's just a stage.
You'll grow out of it.
Adolescence is not a curse.
Your frontal lobes are still developing.
One day your four friends won't be the center of the universe.

So I'll keep on offering my love and support.
Teaching, and unafraid of your debates.
I see so much potential in you.
And, besides, a pension in Heaven awaits.

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