Mom Guilt and Career Ambitions
Being a parent is hard, and when I was kid, I didn't necessarily have ambitions of being a wife and mother.
But that happened, and although the wife part came and went, being a mom is now an exhausting and rewarding experience.
However, balancing my responsibilities and desires to be a good mom with my driving career ambitions and doing everything it takes to be successful with that has been killing me lately.
This summer was blissful. For the first time in I don't know how long I took a vacation and I got engaged. (And for anyone who knows me, that reality didn't seem like it would ever come again—not because opportunity didn't knock but because I never wanted to get married in the first place.) But when you find the right situation, as cliché and as cheesy as it sounds, you just know.
And I do.
But September is upon us and the beginning of the school year is usually my favorite. Of course in years past I was at the top of my teaching game and therefore I knew the road ahead.
This September the course has changed and therefore I'm struggling with the new expectations, taking leadership courses, being mom to a newly minted Middle Schooler and the future wife to the most amazing fiance.
The bottom line is I feel torn.
Since I pride myself on being at the top of my game, I'm already recognizing that I'm not taking good enough care of myself. There hasn't been time to work out like I was last year or all summer. I'm not eating well, and I'm stressed.
Although, stress isn't the best word because it feels more encompassing than that, and it is way too soon in September to feel this way.
Being a hopeful person, and a mindful one, I look to ground myself.
It's hard to feel good about stuff though when I get the call from my son at the end of the day asking me when I'm coming home or when I realize I need to run to the doctor to get my immunization information or they will lock me out of Blackboard.
When is there time?
So today, I breathe.
A calendar will be made with alarms reminding me to eat and drink water and a concerted effort will be afforded to take a walk in the middle of the day to ensure I move around enough. I can't remember the last time I had so many days in a row where I didn't make my step goals.
Balance is extremely hard, and when there are amazing things going on in your life, you have to make time to enjoy them, to truly experience them.
And that's what I'm working on.
Anyone have advice for a woman with many hats and shoes to fill? I'm listening! Thanks in advance.